Confidence isn't about thinking you're the greatest thing there ever was. It's not about being sure that you're the best looking person in the room. It's about ownership of your body. When you feel ashamed of your body, when you hid your body, when you curse your body, you are owning the judgments and prejudices of society.
Now let me make this as clear as I can. You are not the negative thoughts or criticisms of other people. Do not own that. If someone tells you how your body, your face, your personality, is not pleasing to them and you make the choice to internalize that then you are allowing that person to define you as an object. You are seeing yourself through the perspective of how you can be used by someone else.
Your body, the way it is in this exact moment, is an extension of you and your existence. You are a completely unique individual. No one will ever experience the world the same way as you. No one can hear music like you do. No one can see colors like you do. No one will ever think the same thoughts as you. You are an entire universe in one body. Something as alive and dynamic as that can never be an object. You choose how to define yourself.
You can take yourself right now, right this second, without any adjustments or changes, and own yourself. Let go of the idea that your body has to fit into the parameters that make you the most useful to others and start figuring out how your body can be the most useful to you.
I never would have allowed my body to do something like this a few years ago. When I found Cayan Ashley Photography at a wedding show a few months back, I fell for her representation of female beauty . Her images captured the connection between the spirit and the body of her subjects, not the usefulness of a woman's sex appeal. It was unlike any other boudoir photography I had ever seen. I was thrilled when we connected through Instagram and when I came to the junction between deeming my body as unworthy of being documented this way or honoring my experience as an individual, I made the choice to discount the definition that society has put on my body. I wanted to live this and that's the only thing mattered.
Was it scary? Heck yes. Sometimes, I still get scared just by looking at these photos. But, I also feel incredibly brave and strong for having pushed passed a barrier that has held on to me so tightly. These photos exist because I want them too and it doesn't matter what anyone else sees.
So, now I challenge you to unlock something in yourself that you've held captive or didn't allow yourself to experience because you weren't "worthy" of it. Remember. The only perspective that matters is yours.
Outfit 2: Dress: Torrid | Bralette: Torrid | Underwear: Torrid
Outfit 3: Sweater: Kohl's | Corset: Orchard Corsets